Listening to things you ought not hear.

Day 29 –> 20 Me!

 

——————————————

I asked for this.

Because I loved.

I got hurt again.

Once again… I expected that someone would love me. Throwing a line out to sea… to see if I can catch a dream.

 

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Earlier, I heard that the guy I love is courting someone… someone I don’t know.

He was asked and he was more than happy to share the whole story. It so happens that I’m sitting opposite him.

Too painful.

Ouch.

———————

My team mate told me that if I love someone… THIS TIME, don’t tell the guy how I feel.

I tend to do that.

All my crushes before, for example, whenever I feel lighthearted, I just blurt out those words, “You know I like you right? It’s the kind of like that I want to be with you.”

And this time, my male team mate told me to act like a normal girl.

Flirt with a lot of guys and make them think I like them but would turn out that I don’t care about them.

————————–

But I’m too honest for that.

How can I just change?

When I don’t like something, I say it.

When I like something, I say it.

Cos I don’t want misunderstandings to happen.

But isn’t that exactly what happened now? Maybe my crush thought that I wouldn’t like him since I always call him “big brother” like I do with all the males in the office who are older than me… cos I was raised to be polite even when unnecessary and especially to those who is not my family.

 

—————————————————————-

I felt like I lost love and opportunity. DAMN.

DON’T MAKE HIM FALL FOR ANYONE ELSE BUT ME LORD!! Yes, like the others in love, I’m selfish. If I let go of him easily, that means that I didn’t really like him. And, I really… really… really.. like him!

PLEASE!

How can I make you fall?

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